You might have seen a small, stooped old man, shuffling down the sidewalk…



hair disheveled, shirt buttoned wrong, shoes on the wrong feet…Here's what I saw...




Note Card: Safety Lies Not at a Distance

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

Date Unknown
When you're at the top, as God is, it can be very lonely, especially if you're a good guy.  Can't He sit in the sunshine and play with a cat too?  Or watch children play?  ...not to trivialize God.  He did mention playing with leviathan as a man would play with a bird[Also Psalm 104:26] What did He do on that one seventh day?  Does He take pleasure in us?

A Penny for Caleb's Thoughts

I wish to congratulate my son for taking 1st Runner Up in an Alzheimer's Foundation of America scholarship essay contest with almost 1800 participants.  His essay, entitled A Penny for Your Thoughts: A Jar of Memories, interweaves his favorite memory of his grandfather with his memories of the experience of losing his grandfather to Alzheimer's disease.  The essay is brilliantly written and marks Caleb as a writer to follow in the years to come.


Click here to read this essay.


Other things Caleb has written about his grandfather may be found here and here.

Note Card: WWJD

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  What would Jesus do?  Walk on water.  What would Jesus do?  Drive out the money changers with a whip...doesn't mean you should try it.  The note card below is reflective of my own opinion on the trite little WWJD; so I will share it.  Others may think this best left unsaid.  They are welcome to that opinion, but if we redesign Christianity into a pop culture paradigm, the salt has lost its savor.  Christians will never do pop culture as well as the pagan world does it.]

June 14, 2001
WWJD?  Give me a break!  You do not know what Jesus would do, probably not what you want to convince me that he would do.  You have some screwy ideas, anyone who would ask WWJD; Jesus was too unpredictable to fit your scheme or mine.

Note Card: I Look For Men Like That

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

April, 2002
My tendency is always to estimate a man [or] an author by the estimate which he appears to have of the Bible.  Is he for it or against it?  Does he love the words of God?  Is he jealous of God's words?  Does he oppose the wicked who love to pick at it because it exposes them?  I look for men like that.

The Bridge to Moses

It is in the wee hours of the morning, and I have tried and failed to achieve a state of slumber.  Illumined by a single lamp, I now sit on my couch, glaring grumpily at my coffee table and listening to the ambient sounds of my sleeping household.  From the neighboring kitchen, a clock’s tick, normally lost in the hubbub of life, chronicles the steady march of sleepless time.  The refrigerator compressor kicks on for a few minutes, then yields to the mournful sound of a distant train, penetrating the glass of a window behind my head.



I am bored, and so I eventually rise and make my way to my empty guest bedroom where there awaits me a large bookcase filled with a wide selection of literature.  Before this structure I plant myself and begin, somewhat absently, to scan the familiar, and somewhat musty rows of fact and fiction found thereupon. 

Note Card: On Secret Thoughts

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  The thoughts that follow come from the book of Job, but they are not the usual lessons others have gleaned from this book.]

April 23, 2002
Lessons from Job:  The really significant issues of a man's life are those that are beyond the view of other men.  These are the things that God observes, and He Himself keeps them close to His own secret thoughts, all the while engaging Himself with others in other matters of heavenly business and activity.  Since the secret thoughts of a man are the real measure of a man, we may, with some security, assume that God's secret thoughts are those that reveal who He is also.  

If a person chooses to disclose to another the thoughts that he has to himself, that other person is in a privileged place of honor; and the more honorable the person is who tells his secret motivations, the greater the privilege of the person listing to his words...and not merely the privilege of being on the inner circle of a noble person, but one could not help but realized that he is considered to be able to appreciate and sympathize with the thoughts of that person.  Who is man that God should open up His heart to him and want man to know Him as the angels never could?

Note Card: Beauty, Tranquility, Happiness

[Blog Author's Note:  Happy Valentine's Day, Mom.]

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

December, 2006
Thinking of Connie and what she has done, and of how she has fulfilled the model role of a woman in her life...

She took whatever I could get and transformed it into beauty and tranquility and happiness.  She strives to do that with everything she touches for everyone.  She deserves much better than anything I could get for her.


Note Card: On Understanding Women

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

December, 2006
For a man to say he does not understand women is not true.  Part of it is that he is not willing to understand them or that he has not tried to understand them. 

Perhaps the reverse is true, that women do not understand men.  But...women, being relational beings, try to understand men and often are successful.

Note Card: The Jig is Up

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  When my father wrote this, he had 3208 days to get his house in order.]

August 21, 2002
I am beginning to understand why my mental outlook is changing in this last period of my life.  Truly God has so arranged life that a man would be increasingly chuted into a pondering of who he is before the eyes of God.  The whole experience often brings tears to my eyes.  The jig is up, so to speak.  Get thy house in order, for thou shalt die and not live.  I have a lot of "getting in order" to do.

Note Card: The Last Word

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  To avoid confusing readers of Catholic background, note that the word "saints" is used below as a reference to all persons who have appropriated redemption in Jesus Christ.]

May 22, 2006
Hebrews 9:28 -  "...unto them that look for him shall he appear the second time without sin unto salvation."  For saints, when Jesus comes (returns), no more will his purpose be for sins, as if he did not quite finish at Calvary, for never again will the issue arise as to our sins or our sinfulness, for all of that is gone. 

Then why does it bother us?  Because we know ourselves.  If he will not mention it, why should we?  If we think it, is he?  Do we really assess Calvary adequately?  If we entertain fear, is that unbelief?  Or is it simply a residual flavor of this world and of the spirit of the age?

Note Card: We Do Groan, Being Burdened

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  The Note Card entry below contains some good thoughts but particularly caught my attention as a good example of a style that is typical of my dad's writings.  When he mentions his darker thoughts, he does not leave them simply to stand on their own but concludes by turning them toward brighter thoughts of hope in God.  Throughout this blog, I have tried to follow this same pattern as I have discussed the tragedy of those dark final days of his struggle with Alzheimer's Disease.  We are in good company, for this is the common pattern of the Psalms.]

August 15, 2002
I do not like life; it's too much trouble.  We that are, in this tabernacle do groan; being burdened.  Someone said it well:  Life is hard; then you die.  [Eric's Eulogy mentions this same statement.]  We who have sworn allegiance to Jesus are the children of God -children- bewildered, unskilled, exposed.  Some might think I am a wise man.  If turning my back to that which is transient is wise, then I suppose I am.  In the end, however, it is for God to say.  I am willing to wait for that. 



Note Card: A Stranger and Pilgrim Observes a Hardee's Dining Room

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  My father was a regular patron of the Ocoee Hardee's, where he spent many of his mornings and where many of the note cards featured on this site were written.  He was not quite the pariah he seems to describe below.  My son accompanied him one morning and reports that my father took him all around the Hardee's dining room, introducing him to all of the other regulars who, as a matter of habit, congregated there each morning.  My dad's sense of aloneness stemmed from the fact that he was so heavily invested in the next world that he had not the knowledge or ambition to pursue many things which occupy the minds of others.]

August 17, 2002
I can look around Hardee's and see worldly-wise men, assured, "successful", engrossed in their pursuits, talking with their families, in their own little worlds.  I am not one [of them] but a stranger...They would be bored with me, which is fine.  I couldn't succeed if I doubled my speed, for I'm not going that way.  To them I'm a stranger, yes...to myself also a pilgrim.

Note Card: She Was Better Than I Deserve

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.


March 25, 2004
Thinking back to the days of the daily war to get money for the family, it was hard, but through all of it, Connie was always there, doing her part.  She was and still is better than I deserve.  If I had it to do again, I would do it with her, and I would try to be a better man.  I just hope that, in the life to come, our paths will often cross.

The Fullness of Time

Christmas Day of 2011 finds me with some moments to reflect upon the events of the past year, events which have brought hardship and, indeed, death to my family, events which have also brought new life.  For purposes of such reflection, I have taken a seat in a guest bedroom of my wife’s parent’s house, my position allowing me to gaze out at the winter branches of the woods behind their North Georgia home.  An intermittent rain spits from a grey sky, forming droplets, which cling temporarily to the bare branches before completing their journey to the cold, adhesive Georgia clay.  There is, in this scenery, a beauty best enjoyed from indoors, and it is evident from the sounds elsewhere in the house that the other family members who have gathered for the holiday have contented themselves with indoor pursuits.

This pilgrimage to my in-law’s home has become a Christmas tradition in the twenty years my wife and I have been married.  To be precise, I believe 18 of our 21 married Christmases have been spent with them.  Though the city and state of my in-laws’ residence has changed and though the cast of characters who gather in their home has evolved, the fun of spending Christmas in a big house surrounded by the smell of food, the laughter of games, and the thump of excited little feet on the stairs is a Christmas tradition that continues to call us back year after year.  So it is that this view of the bare winter branches upon North Georgia hillsides is familiar to me.  It is a part of who I am, and the life I have led, the familiar curse of Interstate 75, followed by the blessing of family.

Note Card: Now They Break Down the Carved Work

Written on a 4x6 note card by Stan Julin.

[Blog Author's Note:  My father never heard of Occupy Wall Street, but he offered some commentary on their ilk.]

May, 2004
I suppose that, if a mob could be easily persuaded to ask the crucifixion of Messiah, we should hardly be surprised that this populace should burn down the city that our forefathers built with their own blood.  A man was famous according as he had lifted up his axe against the thick trees; but now they break down the carved work thereof at once with axes and hammers.  Thus vision and industry, hopes and dreams, faithfulness and affections, truth and liberty are vilely thrown away.